Sky’s Chief Executive Jeremy Darroch had a good old chuckle today when Setanta asked him for £50m interest free - before realising they were serious.

Mr Darroch is reported to have responded to the request by saying “You’re having a giraffe, right? It’s a joke, isn't it? It’s not? Get out. Get fucking out.”

Stinky Ponky consulted Business Analyst Mario Cart from the Skopje University Business College in the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia to see what had gone wrong for Setanta. "It's a complicated situation, but it can be simplified. Setanta are asking the wrong people for money. At the end of the day Sky are a cynical company who take advantage of their customers and will have no qualms at all about squeezing you for cash - they're not a bank.

"Ok, that wasn't a good example."

Stinky Ponky asked Mr Cart if he thought Setanta would survive; "To be honest, I think there's more chance of me knobbing the Queen but you never know, there's a lot of idiots with too much money out there. And I've never met Her Majesty."

We asked Sky's Mr Darroch for a few words on the subject. He said; "So - they nick all the games off us and charge our customers extra to use them," he told us, "and then when it all goes tits up they come crawling for a hand out. I was so happy I nearly came. But seriously, they can fuck right off. Help Setanta? I'd rather lick shit off a witch."