Dave Watt, from Ilfracum Town Council told Stinky Ponky "It all started when we asked our publicity company Old Rope to produce a new, fresh and exciting logo and slogan to promote the town. Well, six weeks and £17,000 later and they came back with the word 'Ilfracombe' in a plain font on a white background but - and this is the brilliant part - they made the dot on the lower case 'i' into a little squiggle. Now, they say that it's meant to represent a fish or the aerial view of the coastline but I defy anyone to look at it without thinking 'sperm.'

 

"But we're ok with that.  We looked at it and looked at each other and had one of those 'are you thinking what I'm thinking' moments, and after some confusion caused by the fact that most people were thinking one thing but Tony from town planning was thinking about how good it would be if he was invisible, we all agreed to dedicate the town to spunk.

 

"Even the slogan fits perfectly. If you take the initials C.C.C. from 'curious coastal charm' and add the letters O and K before taking away one of the C's you get COCK. See? It's uncanny when you think about it, because there's an obvious connection between cocks and hot love yoghurt.

 

"So we're currently brainstorming some ideas of how to use man fat to promote the town. Everyone's put their ideas down on paper and put them in this box. Shall we have a look? Here we go, ah yes, this one is Tony's, I recognize the crayon.

 

"Hmmm, I'm not sure that Barclays would like to have their local branch renamed The Wank. And I don't think he's really thought through the Saturday afternoon speed chuffing contest either. Oh, and I suppose being a seaside town this particular reference was inevitable...

 

"But you still have to be impressed with how many different uses he's found for the word semen."