Alan Duncan, a gay conservative minister, responded by saying that the two men were simply "stirring up hatred and division" adding, "The Honorable Mr Bradshaw's being a bit of a cow, isn't she?"

 

Mr Bradshaw replied "It's no good denying it. There's a deep strain of homophobia on the conservative benches. I think you'll find they're being nice to your face but really they hate you sweety. I've seen the writing on the wall. The toilet wall as it happens."

 

Mr Duncan was then said to have run out crying, calling Mr Bradshaw "You little bitch," to which Mr Bradshaw said "Ooo, get her."

 

Prime Minister Gordon Brown, texture like sun, said "The Conservative party has a long history of queer bashing. You've never liked gays whereas the Labour Party really loves them. It's a regular sausage fest over here, let me tell you. Many Labour politicians are proud bummers and we also have the hottest lesbians by far."

 

In response to the accusations Tory leader David Cameron said "You're not going to let us forget section 28, are you? Well you should know that as a child I found John Inman to be hilarious. The skinny one with the specs from the Carry On films was also very good indeed. In fact I have many friends who are fairies; I have no fear of those who lift shirts. My colleague the Honorable Woofter is welcome to stand next to me at a urinal any time he pleases.

 

"As long as he doesn't peep at my winky."