Labour girl Caroline Flint has said that she resigned her ministerial position because the Prime Minister didn’t… Oh look! Isn’t that a beautiful handbag?

Ms Flint, who under the last Prime Minister was referred to as a ‘Blair babe’ - which is like a Blair Witch but without the snotty nose and nausea inducing camera work – has revealed that she felt Gordon Brown, texture like sun, did not have confidence in her loyalty. Downing Street have released a statement in response saying “Who? Do you mean the tea girl? I didn’t realise she was a minister. She always left the bag in the cup too long for my liking.”

Ms Flint made her comments on GMTV as they are always nice to politicians, unlike the nasty BBC who have been known to ask uncomfortable questions. “I couldn’t have gone on the BBC” she later admitted. “They might have made me cry and anyway their couch would have clashed with my favourite shoes.”

Stinky Ponky’s political analyst, Professor John Wonderwall from the University of Western Democracy in the Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia, told us “Her departure from Westminster will be greeted with a mixed reaction. Many of the male members will be disappointed as they will not be able to sit behind her and try and cop an eyeful down her blouse. On the other hand, as she won’t be parking there any more insurance claims should drop quite sharply.”

Ms Flint has also been accused of plotting against Mr Brown; something she has strongly denied. “A group of women ministers who have been meeting regularly for some time now, occasionally to have a meal and a drink together, while sticking pins in a Gordon Brown doll, is not about plotting,” she said.

Stinky Ponky asked Ms Flint if she was likely to return to politics. "Oh no," she told us, "I've had quite enough of that. I'm looking to open a nail salon in Kentish Town. Return to politics? I'd rather... Oh dear, that's really not her colour, is it?"